We are living in a time that many of us never thought we would ever see. Schools are closed, businesses are closed, beaches and parks are closed, there are lines outside of grocery stores with people standing 6 feet apart while wearing masks. A time where we are all asked to stay home and social distance not only to save ourselves, but to save others and stop spreading a virus. All of this seems so unreal, like I am having a bad dream or that I am a character in a movie that I would never agree to watch despite my husband’s pleading.
As I sit this morning drinking my coffee in my sunroom and listening to quiet that I would not normally hear on a Tuesday morning unless there was a snow storm, I started thinking about how much of what seemed so awful yesterday will be missed tomorrow. Will any of these “new” behaviors and thoughts stay with us when our lives are back to “normal”? Will we still see ourselves and others out walking at a slower pace and really seeing everything around us instead of hurriedly walking and talking about the stresses of the day? Will we still take notice of the daily changes in the trees and flowers outside? Will we miss this time together as a family? I know I will.
I am embarrassed to say that I have found myself stressed over some of the wrong things during this time. Stressed because we can no longer have everything we want when we want it. I found myself in tears after numerous nights trying at midnight to order groceries with no success because somehow other people’s computers must be faster than mine. Groceries that I want, but not desperately need. Feeling so much pressure that my family might not be able to have their favorite baked french toast on Easter this year unless I can find a way to get French bread while not potentially exposing my asthmatic lungs to this deadly disease. Trying unsuccessfully to order items to put together Easter baskets. All of these things that felt so important at the time, really aren’t that important are they? While it is disappointing to not celebrate Easter with family like we always do, isn’t it more important that we are safe, have a home to be together in, and food to eat regardless of what it is?
Maybe all of this will help us appreciate what we have more and not take everything for granted. Maybe next year if things are back to “normal” that Easter brunch will be cherished and appreciated more. Maybe we’ll all find we aren’t throwing away as much food. Maybe even when l can go back to running to the store for every little thing, I will decide to continue making my own tortillas, pasta, and pizza dough. Maybe I will still hear my children’s laughter alongside the bouncing sound of a basketball more often.
Just maybe.
